The Houses of Hogwarts – The Digital Marketing Office
The digital marketing office is a strange and wonderful working environment, unlike any other in the world. With so many contrasting dynamics and personalities colliding at any one time, a digital agency is never short of some form of drama or exciting occurrence. Despite being different in their own individual rights, the general make up of most digital agencies remain exactly the same. Typically, an agency will consist of four major departments: web development, web design, digital marketing and SEO/social.
In this article we are going to demonstrate how these four departments can be perfectly matched to the four houses within Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Yes, you read that right, digital marketing companies are set up in the same way as Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff and Slytherin; or the other way around in fact. It may seem absurd at first; likening a tangible, technology focused industry to a magical, made-up land of fiction and entertainment. But give this article a read before you expelliarmus and it may just change your perspective!
Digital Marketers and Content Specialists
First up is Gryffindor; perhaps the most famous and recognisable of all Hogwarts’ houses due to its most celebrated member, Mr Potter himself. Harry, Ron and Hermione all belonged to Gryffindor and their heroic ventures often saved not only themselves but the whole of Hogwarts too. Brave, calm under pressure, daring and courageous – these are the traits expected of Gryffindor members and so ably showcased by each of these three members.
With this in mind then, it is quite clear that Harry, Ron and Hermione would all suit digital marketing or content marketing roles perfectly! How? Well the premise is basically the same. To be a great digital marketer or content specialist you need to be brave, daring and calm under pressure. To obtain the best results you need to be courageous in your approach, be willing to leap before you look and try things that have never been tried before.
It’s all about putting the right content in the right places and directing enough attention towards it to gain success and digital awareness. Chivalry, honesty and nerve are all required to be able to do this effectively and therefore these practices are definitely best suited to the Gryffindor house. Plus, Gryffindor members are only permitted entrance to their dormitory if they provide the Portrait of The Fat Lady with the correct password, which changes regularly. If you are a digital marketer or content specialist then you can already empathise with the pain of remembering admin passwords!
Programmers and Web Developers
Ravenclaw on the other hand values wisdom, logic, creativity and intellect. Showcasing an eagle as their emblem; this signifies strength, intelligence and power. It is due to these properties that we believe Ravenclaw is best suited to programmers and web developers. Often regarded as the quiet types, developers and indeed Ravenclaws are not renowned for making much fuss or causing too much drama. They quite simply get on with their job and do so by always applying a degree of common sense and intellect to each task.
All of these values epitomise a web developer as they are extremely intelligent and sharp-minded beings. You can almost never argue with their logic as they possess knowledge way beyond the realms achievable by mere muggles or alternative house members. Most digital marketing agencies operate in this way; if you are not a developer yourself then you have no idea what these people do specifically but you can appreciate the work and understand the results. Who cares about A + B as long as C is in working order? That’s the way developers like it too; you have no business messing around in their A + B as long as they consistently deliver C.
Programmers are frequently presented with technical issues and mind-bending problems; it is therefore weirdly appropriate that Ravenclaw members have to answer a riddle before being granted access to their dormitory. The riddle, in this case, can be anything from “where has my banner gone?” to “my CMS has crashed can you help?”
Designers and Brand Builders
Hufflepuff members advocate hard work, loyalty, dedication, patience and friendliness. These are, of course, all the traits of a web designer and/or brand builder. They are both defined by the love they have for their friends, family and profession. Hufflepuffs live to help people and are extremely practical, preferring to focus on what is achievable rather than what is possible. This is useful when it comes to web design as a lot of clients make unrealistic demands in terms of what they want to see on their website.
Despite this, designers and brand builders are extremely tolerant and patient as frequent draft materials and edits are required of them on a regular basis. When you are a designer, your job is almost hardly ever done; there are always some small tweaks to make here and there right up until the last minute of the delivery date. This behaviour, just as Hufflepuff dictates, requires a lot of loyalty and dedication to the cause. It is also extremely important to be friendly, approachable and patient with others.
In order for Hufflepuffs to gain access to their dormitory they must systematically tap a barrel, to a specific rhythm, located in the basement of Hogwarts. This anal approach to entering a room can most definitely be likened to the common OCD-like behaviour of many designers. We all know what they are like; pens in the right places, rulers aligned straight against the desk and pencils perfectly sharpened etc. This suits our digital artists right down to the ground!
SEO and Social Media Specialists
Last but not least, the cunning and ambitious Slytherin. This determined, resourceful and innovative group of witches and wizards are represented by a serpent; perfectly highlighting their sneaky, cunning and slippery nature. It is not all as negative as it sounds though, as the snake also represents stealth, intelligence and power. It is because of this mix of traits that Slytherin is renowned for producing some truly great wizards and yet some incredibly evil ones too. Perhaps the most unspeakable of all these evil bodies is Voldemort himself, who attended Slytherin as a minor.
For these reasons, Slytherin is absolutely perfectly suited to SEO staff members and social media specialists. In particular, SEO geeks are considerably more suited than social media gurus as they too are subjected to good and evil practices. This was especially true in the days of white hat and black hat SEO, otherwise known as Snape and Malfoy SEO for the sake of this article. As with the much feared and misunderstood house name, SEO can be considered sneaky, manipulative and cunning; but for all the right reasons in this case! Geniuses are made in Slytherin and they have no time for complete do-gooders who aren’t willing to take a risk – this is exactly the same for the geniuses involved in the SEO game.
Moreover, social media specialists share a similar sentiment, only they wish to be involved in everybody else’s business too. Maybe it is because Slytherins are true bloods that they do not trust anyone else and therefore have to poke their noses in everyone’s affairs. This is basically the day-to-day responsibility of most social media campaigners; to be nosey and talk to as many people as possible. Most of what these guys do is under wraps and unbeknown to the rest of the digital agency. So therefore it is weirdly appropriate that the Slytherin dormitory is located deep underground, beneath the Black Lake and away from everyone else.
Harry Potter and the Digital Marketing Agency
So as you can see, we thoroughly believe we’ve cracked the secret behind J.K. Rowling’s thought process when creating Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The globally recognised writer must have been thinking of a digital marketing agency as she penned her ideas for a quadruple house system and clearly took influence from the groups within them to shape the house traits.
Well, that’s what we’re sticking to anyway. You heard it here first! Now, expelliarmus!